It’s four in the morning,

in the city that never sleeps.

Sticking to its nickname,

people crowded the streets,

going this way and that,

paying little attention to detail.

It sounds, to many, like an enjoyable life.

Each day filled with adventure.

And maybe it could be,

if those crowds of people were not invading my home,

shooting looks of disgust,

if I could afford to live in the fancy apartments,

rather than the outside of the downtown stores,

if I could afford the restaurant foods,

rather than the cheapest items in quikmart,

if I could escape the shadows,

that I must hide my face in.

For the streets have been my home for the last six months.

I must live in the shadows

to hide my face from judgement and ridicule.

People are scared of the darkness,

and fear most that I might drag them in with me.

For in the dark,

There’s no hand to pull you out.

Any money that I am able to collect,

must be spent immediately to keep my heart beating.

I wake with the sole purpose to survive,

which becomes less valuable,

at each sunrise and set

People see me

and think of what I could do to hurt them.

If I would just snap

and go to desperate measures

in order to survive.

With the world that we live in,

people would rather keep themselves as far away from the darkness as possible,

rather than help pull me out.

So instead they will go to desperate measures

to make and maintain a large sum of money.

When you live in the city,

it’s easy to live in the shadows.

For even on the brightest of summer days,

you can depend on the city buildings

to block the light.

The fluorescent lights on the top of the company buildings

shine bright throughout the night.

They seem to be present only to

contrast the dark shadows of the streets.

Living in the shadows is impossible

without a source of light,

a constant reminder of what you could have,

But don’t.

So close,

But so far.

I sit in my shadow,

under my blanket,

and look at my metal jar sitting beside me.

Emptied for my dinner last night,

not a single penny is left.

I look up to see the crowds increasing in number.

Here comes the disgust,

the fear,

as though I wasn’t human,

a monster.

And in the center of the whole crowd

is a little boy holding his mom’s hand.

His eyes locked with mine.

While I was filled with embarrassment of my clothes and home,

he just smiled at me with curious eyes.

And the sunlight began to poke through,

as the sun rose behind the little boy