Not knowing what is happening
What is next
This can eat away at a person

Not knowing makes my mind feel fuzzy
all I can focus on
Is that one thing
That I don't know
Sitting in a cold classroom staring at the wall
Hearing nothing at all but
Just my thoughts
About the thing
That i do not know
I hear my name from the teachers voice
“Pay attention”
But i can only pay attention to that one thing
That i just keep going
Not knowing

Not knowing is driving me crazy
I ask for someone who knows
But all they say is
It will all be alright
But i do not know
What if it is not going to all be all right
What if he doesn’t wake up
What if i forever go on
Not knowing

Not knowing if the last time was the actual last time
If i never got to say goodbye
All the things that we were supposed to do
I thought we had so much time left
I did not know there was a possibility that
We didn't

Not knowing
I’m constantly told bad news
Or what others tell me is bad
Sometimes when people talk their words blur together
I feel like my mind is in a whole different place
Only focused on that thing that seems to never
Get better
Then i get a little good news
Then more bad news
It goes good bad good bad
Until the war ends
38 days of not knowing
And then I am told the news that I didn't want to know
What i prayed to god every night asking for the outcome
To not be this
But I now know
What is happening
And i am no longer going on
Not knowing